“(Love) It does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong.”
1 Corinthians 13:5
I debated how to title this blog. I could easily go for a word that would instantly get a fire started: Eros. Oh wait the modern term is erotic. I think of all the words that mean love this the one that is misused and misunderstood the most. Like the word sex it is a word that has been view as notorious.
L o v e is under attack. I am sure you know that too well. That is why we have been talking about the word for the past three weeks. We use this powerful little world to express a huge gamut of ideas and expressions. In the Greek language, from which we take quite a bit of the English, there are five kinds of love. Mania, eros, philos, storgy, and agapeo. Each one has a different context that defines how love is expressed.
Eros is the love of lovers. Yes, it is romance. Eros is also sexual. It is the bond between two people that can be something very hard to destroy. Life is created and the winter passes into spring because of this expression of love. Eros is as gentle as a refreshing dew yet in the wrong hands it can be as explosive as TNT.
Being romantic is a term that is being watered down in meaning. There was something to be said about pursuing a woman and seeking after her hand in marriage. People still had the same passions folks have today. However, they knew the beauty in waiting to have sex until marriage. Sex was a thing to look forward to. They knew where it lead to and that it had pleasure and purpose. What makes true love real is when it seeks the best for both lovers. Have we lost the thrill of anticipation for getting it all right now?
Being said, this is where then concept of love has been bombarded. The world has tried to kill romantics by saying self-control is weakness. I have heard the same voices expressing their opinions:
“If you don’t have sex you really don’t love that person.”
“Why wait for marriage? Patience wastes time.”
“I have to get it now, get all I can, out of life while I can.”
To be honest it sounds more like the words of a leech or a parasite than a human being. Having sex takes no thought at all, but being romantic takes work. I realize that after a while even the passion of sex can cool. Learning the art of romance allows the heart and the mind to work in harmony. I think it adds the layer of spice that can not only reignite the wonder of sex, but add a layer that takes it to a whole other level. You may or not believe me but quality can trump quantity in this case.
I know that I am a romantic at heart. However, when you do not use it, that skill gets a bit rusty. I know this love word is one I need to practice more. How many of us want to learn how to be romantic again and not just be sexually active? Because, that is the kind of love endurance that really will last a lifetime.
I know that debate about what marriage is a hot one. It is part of the war on love that creates battle lines between people. We do live in a pleasure-seeking society. I believe that guarding our love in his area can turn the tide of this conflict. You can yell and scream at people about their choice of who they wish to marry. However, the truth is eros has its limitations. It works best when the real lover of the soul has two committed people loving Him. Living that out, passing through the struggles, and living in victory, will speak volumes to those who are trying to create a marriage with only the stuff of this world. We have a access to a sharper arrow than Cupid when it comes to eros.
If you will please excuse me, I am going to start thinking and praying about how to romance my wife. You know, when we were first dating some fifteen years ago, she use to enjoy getting a random I love you card. (Of course as I am thinking about this what should catch my eye but a special card on my desk. Thank you Lord. You are a romantic at heart too.)